Predictions for the year 2020, collected on 26 October 2011, as part of a workshop with the MA Practising Theatre and Performance, Aberystwyth University. Our methods: collective premonition, a magic 8-ball and some cartomancy.

In 2020, some of us will still be wearing spandex after the spandex craze of 2012. Some of us will be riding bikes. Some of us will be celebrating the 8th anniversary of Thatcher’s death from lovesickness. By 2020, some of us will have graduated and, against all odds, the education will have paid off. The Aberystwyth riots of 2014 will be a distant memory now that Aberystwyth is an underwater town guaranteeing cheap accommodation for everyone. But some people will have kept their hoodies. Some of us will be house-owners. Some of us will be married. Some of us will have children. Some of us will have families in Vienna. Some of us will still be struggling for money. People will have stopped watching bad television, so there will have been no casting show sending poor people into space; rich tourists will still be the only ones able to afford space travel. Others will have to settle for Latin America. Luckily, there will still be some rainforest left (though it’s unclear how much). The first space tourists will still tell about seeing the meteor that struck the white house in 2016 fly past their space hotel. Some people will still remember that there was peace in 2015. However, new peace negotiations will be taking place under Somali leadership. Some of us will have a dog called Jake. Some of us will have a lizard called Janice. Some of us will have a boy called Robert. Some of us will live in a different country with different birds in the sky. In 2020, “Marina 2”, the sequel to the 2019 Hollywood blockbuster “Marina”, will be released, focussing on the events leading up to the powercut in the cryogenics gallery at Tate Modern that led to Abramović’s untimely death in 2018. In 2020, we will not shop at Poundland anymore, for two reasons: firstly, it will have been renamed to Euroland in 2017, and secondly, we won’t go out to shop anymore, instead products will shop for us. Facebook will have taken over the world, which will not come as a surprise after in 2016 it had been revealed to have been a data mining project funded by the CIA. The Vice will finally be cool. The prime minister of the UK will not be a white heterosexual male. We will be happier as a population. After having gotten really bad, things will finally get better.

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